the Trick
by 4485
Summary: Something's wrong with our dear Edward Elric, and He's gone to the office to talk about it. No real talking is involved, but how does Roy, Maes, and Jean help him? ONE SHOT


Lieutenant Havoc opened the door to his commanding officer's office, just as he always does when he needs to turn in a report. Except there was something wrong; Colonel Mustang was sitting on the couch, with a small blond boy, who was sitting on the floor, pressing his face into the superiors lap.  
"Wow, chief. You and Ed?" Havoc wondered, honestly surprised.

"Come off it, Fullmetal's..." The brunette glared, but then put his index finger to right under his eye, then led it down to his chin, obviously not wanting to say it.

Just as everyone else in the office(with probable exception to Mustang), Havoc had a soft spot for Edward Elric, the Fullmetal Alchemist. Setting the paper on the desk, Havoc closed the door and knelt next to the boy.

"Hey, Ed. What's wrong?" The blonde replied with a soft sob, then turned his head away. "Come on, you can tell us. We won't tell anyone." Havoc's arm wrapped around Ed's waist, sending shivers up the boy's back.

"Fullmetal, don't worry. Everything will be fine." Mustang's hand drifted to the top of the boy's head, where it rotated softly, slightly messing up the blond hair.

With that, the door opened once again, this time to reveal Major Hughes, who whistled. "Wow, a three way?" He laughed. "In the office, even."

Both Mustang and Havoc glared at the newcomer. Hughes then realized something was wrong, and he closed the door and shuffled over. "..so what's going on?"

Havoc informed the Major, who crouched down and set his hand on the blonde's far shoulder, his elbow almost touching Havoc's forearm. "Ed? Are you going to be ok?" The boy's small shoulders raised up, then fell down again, and he sobbed.

"Oh Fullmetal. If this is about some stupid thing, I am going to be so mad at you." Mustang breathed, worry invading his voice. Because of this comment, Ed started trembling, weeping harder than ever.

The other two adults glared at the superior officer, who had a worried and regretful look on his face. All three of them tightened their grips on the blond, and waited in silence for him to stop crying. The only sound that could be heard for about ten minutes was the sound of Ed sobbing and sniffling, along with the occasional 'shh' from Mustang, accompanied by Hughes or Havoc rubbing his back.

When the boy stopped crying, Havoc pulled him into a small hug, Mustang and Hughes getting strangely jealous, reasons unknown to both. The blonde pulled away, and sat between all three adults, who were staring at him.

"Um..." Ed whispered, his voice weak and reluctant. "I guess I should say thanks, and sorry."

"no problem." They all answered at the same time.

The blonde giggled, and the adults all had to fight the urge to say 'aww'.

Havoc checked the time. "Crap, I need to go. I have a date in half an hour!" He sang happily.

"I need to go too, tonight's bridge night for Gracia. I get to watch Elicia!" Hughes stated, and obviously didn't want to bore the others with stories and pictures.

"Oh..." The boy muttered, then kissed Havoc on the cheek. "Thanks." Havoc set his hand on his cheek, as the blond kissed Hughes as well.

All the adults were speechless; Havoc and Hughes with pleasure, and Mustang with shock, and mild jealousy.

Two of the three adults left, and Ed was alone with Mustang. They refused to look at each other at first, until the blonde stood up, and sat next to his commanding officer. "..Thanks, Colonel."

The brunette found his voice. What he didn't find, was his wits. "Do I get a kiss?" He asked, then immediately regretted it, as his face turned a bright pink. "Ah, er, um. I mean...!"

Ed giggled, covering his mouth with a loose fist. "Do you want a kiss?"

The elder of the two had no idea what to say. Colonel Mustang was the brightest pink he'd ever been and fidgeting, about to go into complete flailing. "Erm, ah, uh.."

"That's a yes." The blond closed his eyes, pressing his small lips against the brunette's larger ones. Mustang just paused for a moment, then closed his eyes, and pulled the boy closer. They both, at the same time, opened their mouths and allowed their tongues to interact. The blush eventually disappeared, as the brunette laid down on the couch, authorizing the boy to lay on top of him. After about twenty minutes of making out, Ed got up.

"Fullmetal?"

"I have to go now. I'm sorry." The blonde put his coat back on. "Al will worry if I'm not home soon."

"will you come back tomorrow?" The elder stood up and walked over.

"Most probably." He smiled.

"Well, then, we'll continue tomorrow." Mustang smirked, and pulled the boy in for one last kiss.  
"We'll see about that." The boy whispered, then left the building.

A good twenty feet away, black rectangles appeared all over the boy, as he transformed into a taller, green haired man.

"Oh gross." He sneered, running now. "I didn't expect to have to do that. Note to self: Don't disrupt pipsqueak's love life ever again. Matchbox just _had_ to go and make out with me! SHIT!" The green haired man then jumped onto a roof, then crawled in a small window.

~~THE NEXT DAY~~

Today was the day. The day Edward Elric(the real one) was going to confess his secret crush for his commanding officer, Colonel Roy Mustang. After a year of building up the confidence, no one could talk him out of it.

Ed walked into the office, to be twisted into a hug by Lieutenant Havoc.

"Good morning, Ed!" He sang, as the boy tried to pull away, a small blush intruding his face. Havoc slipped his hand into Ed's, and started dancing. "How are you?"

"What the--!" The blonde muttered, just loud enough for Hughes to take notice and grab his waist, glaring at the other adult over Ed's shoulder.

"Let go now, Lieutenant." The brunette ordered, pressing Ed's ass into his pelvis.

"I got him first!" Havoc protested, as Ed just winced in pain.

"Um, this is a great argument, but can you, you know, NOT HURT ME?!" He screamed, just as Mustang's door opened.

"Fullmetal?" The man asked, scanning the situation. "Havoc and Hughes. I should've known."

Ed turned a bright pink, ashamed of letting his crush see him like this, being fought over by two other men. "Gah, Colonel! It's not what you think!" He stuck his hand out towards his superior, which was grasped by Hughes, and twisted around to be pinned behind his back.

"Hey, Havoc. How about we share? You know, take _turns?_" Hughes suggested seductively, as if to tell Ed he was in danger.

"Great idea. I'll pin him down first, and you get first dibs." Havoc agreed, and started to move towards the library, where they would reserve a private, soundproof room.

"Release Fullmetal. You both should get back to work, idiots." Mustang ordered, walking over.

"Get your own, chief. This one's ours." Havoc sneered, and Hughes nodded his head.

The brunette simply glared, and mouthed 'try me', forcing the other two to drop the blonde, who was up until now, trying to force back tears. He landed on his small ass, muttering a small 'ow', and watched as the two lecherous adults left.

"You ok, Fullmetal?" Mustang asked, crouching down to face him. "You shouldn't lead them on like that."

"I wasn't..!" Ed whimpered, still trying not to cry.

"Here." The brunette stood up, putting his hand out for the boy to use to get up. The blonde hesitated momentarily, but grasped the hand softly. He was then pulled up suddenly, stumbling forward into his crush's chest.

"ah!" He muttered softly, face turning pink. Ed backed up, and was then escorted into the room, where the doors and windows were locked, and shades were drawn. "..What are you doing?" the blonde asked, sitting down on the couch.

"You'll see." Mustang clicked the lights off, then removed his jacket. He strutted across the room, and sat down next to the blonde, who was playing with his thumbs.

"...Colonel?" The boy whimpered, unable to say anything else.

"Yes, Fullmetal?" the brunette answered, leaning farther over than Ed deemed comfortable.

"...I really like you. Really, _really _like you."

"I should hope so." Mustang pressed his lips to the boy's forehead, then moved down to the lips. They connected momentarily, then Ed was the one who pulled away.

"...do you like me?" He wondered aloud, obviously flustered.

"No. I don't like you." The brunette answered, simple as day.

"What?" Ed replied, heartbroken. "Then why'd you kiss me?"

"Because I love you, that's why."


End file.
